


Staged Magic

by thewightknight



Series: First Order Studios Productions [4]
Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: M/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Pure Crack, There is no excuse for this, porn disguised as magic tricks, the first order is a porn studio
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-25
Updated: 2017-12-25
Packaged: 2019-02-20 13:56:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,338
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13148097
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thewightknight/pseuds/thewightknight
Summary: Never plot out the strategy for your next porn video after three bottles of wine.





	Staged Magic

**Author's Note:**

> Again, you don't really need to have read [the rest of the fics in this series](https://archiveofourown.org/series/900096) for it to make sense.

"Camera three's got some lens flare going on. Kill that shit now."  
  
"Aren't you supposed to be on stage?" Finn flashed Hux one of his blinding grins as he fiddled with a few knobs.  
  
"We haven't started filming yet."  
  
Directing from in front of the camera had its challenges but after the success of _Trouble in Paradise_ Snoke had suggested he continue in this double role. Well, insisted, really, and considering his partners he didn't consider it that much of a chore.  
  
"Love the outfit. I can't believe Kylo talked you into wearing pink."  
  
"You and me both."  
  
Kylo looked magnificent, Hux had to admit. He wore a sleeveless tailcoat, tight black pants, and a glossy tophat. His skin glowed under the lights, oiled for effect. Hux knew he looked twinky as hell in his pink latex corset, matching hot pants, and thigh high white stockings. He hadn't worn heels in years but he'd gotten the hang of it with only a little practice, and it was great revenge for talking him into this nonsense, towering over Ren in these rhinestone encrusted platform stilettos.  
  
It had all started out one evening over drinks, sprawled in front of the massive fireplace in their living room. Kylo got absolutely ridiculous when he hit a certain level of tipsiness. He'd started spouting a bunch of silliness and Poe and Finn had got a look in their eyes. By the end of the evening, over Hux's objections, they'd roughed out a script and Snoke had given it a green light. So here they were now.  
  
"Okay, people, let's do this." His actual thoughts ran along the lines of _Let's get this over with_ , but appearances must be kept.  
  
"And we're rolling!"  Thannisson gave him a thumbs' up. Spots focused on Kylo as he emerged from the wings of the stage they'd put together in the basement gym.  
  
"Gentlebeings, welcome! I hope you'll enjoy our show tonight. I know I will." He bowed to the camera with an extravagant flourish, sweeping his hat to the side before standing straight, clicking his heels together and settling the hat on his head.  
  
"Introducing my lovely assistant!"  
  
This was Hux's cue. Another spot focused on him as he entered, taking tiny, mincing steps in his heels. Accepting Kylo's outstretched hand, he allowed himself to be spun, then dipped, one leg extended with the toe pointing towards the lights. When Kylo righted him, he slapped Hux on the ass, hard enough to drive him forward a few steps. That hadn't been in the script.  
  
"We've got quite the show planned for you! Just full of surprises!"  
  
As Kylo prattled on, Hux pushed forward a table from the back of the stage, toeing the locks on the wheels once he had it over the tape marks.  
  
"For my first trick, I'm going to bend my assistant in half! You didn't know you were going to get a contortionist show too, did you?"  
  
How on earth had this dialogue gotten past the editors? With more flourishes and spins, Kylo pressed Hux back against the table and lifted his legs, one by one, fingers tracing the seam lines of his stockings along the backs of his legs from the lace bands that circled his thighs until he'd wrapped his giant hands around Hux's ankles, pushing his legs down until they were flush against his chest.  
  
"Hold those right there for a minute, will you, darling?"  
  
Flashing a brilliant smile, Kylo moved around to the head of the table. Hux heard the whirr of the lens as the camera zoomed in for a closeup up of the pink vinyl stretched taught over his ass. While Hux held his legs in place, hand tucked behind his knees, Kylo fastened cuffs around his ankles. Once he'd been secured, Kylo released the lock and spun the table. Hux kept his eyes focused on the spot directly above him but he still felt a bit queazy when the table came to a stop.  
  
"My lovely assistant has a surprise for us, by the way!"  
  
Now came the tricky part. His shorts were rigged to tear away but they'd snagged a couple of times in rehearsal. Wonder of wonders, they came off like they were supposed to this time, sliding smoothly out from underneath him when Kylo tugged. Wadding up the material in his hand, Kylo tossed it up into the air.  
  
"Okay, freeze!" Kylo held his throwing motion while one of the crew scurried on stage to remove the shorts. Post production, Finn would turn them into a pink rabbit that would hop off the stage. Once she was clear, Kylo continued the motion.  
  
"Well, well, well.  Would you look at that?" Another closeup, focusing on the faceted pink base of the plug he'd revealed with the removal of Hux's bottoms. Kylo leaned in and Hux could feel the heat of his hands against his skin as he framed the plug with his fingers. "Where could that have come from? Must be magic!"  
  
Hux ran through multiplication tables in his head to keep from grimacing as Kylo ran through his spiel. It was the only way he could keep from grimacing at the horrid dialogue. Kylo couldn't resist playing with the plug as he rattled off his lines, and he ad-libbed a few extra, drawing the scene out as he toyed with Hux. They'd better be getting good footage of this. Gripping the edges of the table, he bit his lip as Kylo worked the plug in and out, letting out a shuddering breath as Kylo finally removed it completely. Another stage flourish and Kylo tossed the plug over his shoulder. That hadn't been in the script either. It landed with a thunk somewhere offset, without any crashes of equipment or shouts from the crew, thank goodness. Maybe they could have it turn into a rainbow or a puff of glitter?  
  
"Now for my second trick." Kylo stepped back and with a flourish, ripped his own pants off and threw them into the air. That they'd planned. The finished product would have them change into a flock of crows. Kylo had to freeze while they took multiple still shots to make sure they had his position exactly and and another tech made tape marks for his feet, and then someone handed him a bottle of lube. He locked eyes with Hux while he stroked himself to hardness, teeth worrying at his bottom lip.  
  
"Stop that," Hux hissed. "You'll ruin your makeup."  
  
He'd applied plenty of lube before inserting the plug but Kylo still checked to make sure everything was still good to go before handing the lube off. It took a few minutes to get him back into position but he didn't flag. The man had focus, Hux had to admit.  
  
"Rolling!" called Thanisson and Kylo continued as if there had been no interruption.  
  
"Watch while I make THIS disappear!"  
  
They might be able to pass off Hux's eye-rolling at this line as a reaction to Kylo's making good on his word. At least now the talking was over, or at least for this portion. Now it was all camera and mike work, close-ups of Kylo's dick as he thrust and of their faces. This part, he didn't have to fake. They'd custom-built the table, calculating the height to the millimeter, so Kylo hit his prostate with every stroke. He just had to warn the crew before his orgasm hit. They took another brief break to sheath Hux's cock in a bright green condom. The FX folks had fallen out of their chairs laughing when Poe had told them about this part. He'd decided somewhere between their third and fourth bottles of wine that Hux should ejaculate silk scarves.  
  
When Hux tried to stand afterwards, a combination of shaky legs and stilettos nearly undid him. Kylo caught him as he tottered, plastering him to Kylo's sweaty chest.  
  
"I am so going to get you for this," Hux muttered as he unstuck himself.  
  
"I can't wait."

**Author's Note:**

> I had [this plug](https://www.wildsecrets.com/p/206382/shots-toys-3-5-gold-anal-plug-with-red-sapphire-detail) in mind when writing this fic.
> 
> I also had multiple other scenes planned for this, but they haven't happened and this has been sitting in my WIP folder for almost exactly a year now. Here's the basic ideas for them:
> 
> Hux gets his revenge during the escapology bit. He attaches a vibrator to the anal hook that secures Kylo's rope harness and suckes him off while he tries to get out of the ropes. I had a "sword swallowing" scene planned for Poe. Finn would get sawed in half in the middle of getting spit roasted. All of them would do a "quick change" routine as the grand finale, which would involve every one of them having their cocks in each other's ass in every possible combination. If any of you want to play with these scenarios, you have my blessing!
> 
> Thanks for reading! If you want to say hi, [check out my profile](https://archiveofourown.org/users/thewightknight/profile) for where I’m currently hanging out on this here internet thing.


End file.
